Selfish
by rw4life
Summary: Claire has second thoughts about a certain proposal...NOW COMPLETE!
1. Chapter 1

**_Selfish_**

**AN/ Ok, don't ask, I had written this right after that episode, and figured I never do Heroes (though I've got like 5 stories waiting to be finished on my computer)...Um, it's not great, but I haven't been here in a while, and this story probably won't be relevant seeing as how these past episodes have been going. Ok, time to shut up, Enjoy?**

She leaned her head back and shook her hair, water droplets flying everywhere. She sighed unhappily, and turned off the water. She exited the shower and wrapped a towel around her cold body. She grabbed her shower pail and left the bathroom. She entered her room and stood in the doorway. Gretchen.

The girl was still sprawled across her entire bed, surprisingly at peace, even though there was an attempt at her life earlier that week. Claire placed her shower supplies on the floor quietly and padded over to her bed. She sat down, returning to the feeling she had when Gretchen had asked, "You're not…a virgin, are you?"

She smiled sadly at the sleeping girl. This was the closest she had felt to anyone in a long time, and yet there was that constant nagging feeling. _It wouldn't last._ She sighed once more. The strangest part about the way she was feeling was that Sylar's face continued to flash up at that revelation. She couldn't help but think he was right. _Had been_ right.

The part that made her the saddest was that the one person that would always be there was now dead. The one that had offered to spend eternity with her was dead. The one person she thought of at the question of her virginity was dead.

She shook her head once more, the little water left on her hair flying off. She couldn't think like that. He was the enemy. _Had been_ the enemy.

Yet she wished that he were alive.

Gretchen stirred in her sleep. Sure they were the best of friends now, and she was somewhat attracted to her, and yet…

Claire was the only one who would live forever, and now there was no one left to share forever with. Not an enemy, not a friend, not a lover. She fell back on her bed, letting out a frustrated groan. He was dead, deceased, departed, finished, gone. She was happy. She had to be happy. She should've been happy. She was lonely.

She shut her eyes, and his face was there. She opened her eyes quickly. She had been repulsed at his proposal. But somehow the saying 'you don't know what you've got 'till its gone' seemed to fit this scenario. Now that she had no serial killer to exist with her forever, she wished back his proposal, she wished him back. She was selfish. He had killed hundreds of people, yet she wanted just one person who would understand her, and remember the past with her as they lived surrounded by flying cars.

Gretchen sat up. Claire sighed again. Gretchen understood her, Peter, her dad…but it didn't keep them living forever. They would still be gone by the time she celebrated her 100th birthday, she'd have to replace them over and over and over again.

"Good morning…" her roommate said sleepily. Claire put on her happy face and sat up.

**AN/ Ok, final one I swear. Would anyone like me to continue? I have vague ideas of maybe a chapter in which Claire's wish gets granted, but knowing me and my updating, it would be a wait...let me know what you think by pressing that conveniently large button below!**


	2. Chapter 2

**AN/ Ok, well this is just a quick and short update. I didn't get many comments (which I'm fine with, Sylaire fics don't tend to get many I've noticed...) But the comments I DID get were super supportive and nice and encouraged me to add on! I only hope I didn't disappoint...**

Sylar looked around almost happily. Finally he was back in his body, and though he desperately wanted revenge, he also had to see his city again…through _his_ eyes. He strolled down the street, taking in sights and sounds that were conveniently loud to him. He could hear every song on everyone's iPod, hear people chew their food, hear what a jerk Rebecca's ex was. He was going to have to get used to this all over again.

He entered Central Park and sat at the closest bench. He stretched out and faced the sun. He wanted revenge, but once people knew he was back, he would have no time for this relaxation. He unwound. He remembered HIS feelings, HIS thoughts, and HIS memories… particularly memories pertaining to one blonde individual. HIS Claire.

He called her his own because he knew she would not resist long. Sure she was 'indestructible' but she was also weak. She needed a person to share her life with, whether or not she truly loved them. But she WOULD love him. He sighed happily and sat up. It was time to move on…It was time to kill. An evil sneer donned his previously peaceful face.  
---

Claire sat sadly at her desk, attempting to finish her paper. She took yet another small glance at the empty bed across her own. Gretchen had seemed calm at first, but now she was gone and Claire was alone again. She knew it would happen eventually, but it was too soon to lose another friend. She sighed and faced her computer screen. She was only on her second paragraph…it was a ten page paper. She furiously shut her laptop. She knocked over her pencil cup, her stapler…she ripped the sheets from her bed, she pulled out the clothes from her closet and tossed them to the floor, she stomped on them. There was still not enough destruction. She sat on top of the mess she created and fumed. She may be indestructible. But her life sure as hell wasn't.  
---

Sylar washed his hands. The woman's power was pretty useless. Who cared about the future? He knew he would die alone…that idiot Japanese man told him so. He chuckled to himself for believing the moron; Claire would come to him soon. She had to. Right? He turned off the faucet and hid Angela Petrelli's body in the closet. So much for seeing the future…she couldn't even stop herself from getting killed! As he shut the closet door, he chuckled to himself and spoke out loud, "Ha, 'skeletons in the closet' has sure taken on a new meaning." He stopped and wiped his brow. Would she come to him? He had after all just killed her grandmother, and her biological mother before that, and her biological father, and her friends, and…he shook his head. Maybe he would just check in on her.  
---

Claire had been staring at her ceiling for the past hour. It was fascinating how many images one could see on the rough surface of her ceiling. The last half an hour, however, was devoted to one particular image. A dark haired man, with thick eyebrows and a small smirk. _Sylar._ This was getting ridiculous. She shook her head furiously, but did not move from her spot on the bed. She sighed. She just couldn't help it…it had been so long since she saw the unbreakable man's face. Breakable man. She sighed…she'd been doing that a lot lately. She lifted her heavy limbs and returned to her desk. She almost wanted to join the sorority that had tried to kill Gretchen…anything to get her out of this lonely cage. She shouted at the ceiling, "Normal life isn't as interesting as having you alive!"

"I agree." She froze.

**AN/ I'll try to update as quickly as I did this time around, because this is obviously not done (it would be mean if it was though, wouldn't it?) But this is just me procrastinating, and I could possibly end up having too much work as a result and not have time to finish soon. _BUT_, I WILL make a sincere effort?**


	3. Chapter 3

**AN/ Wow, the chapters just keep getting longer and longer...um well I'm on a roll! It gives you some clue as to how much I'm procrastinating with everything else, but NEVERTHELESS, heeere it is! Hope you like!**

She remained at her desk. She didn't turn around. She recognized that voice anywhere. "You're dead" she said stonily, back still turned, fists clenched tightly. He gave a dry chuckle, " Or so you thought…but that can't be true, can it?" They were silent, "Turn around." Sylar said in a commanding tone that sent shivers down Claire's spine. She couldn't move. Suddenly she felt an invisible pull, spinning her around. " I haven't done that in a while…I'm glad you were my first test subject." Claire remained silent.

"Come now Claire, just a second ago you were pining for me…this is very bipolar of you." She shook her head, "I don't pine for killers." She said harshly. Sylar chuckled once more, pulling her chair closer to him. "That's right…you _yearn_ for them." He crashed his lips against hers.

He hadn't been this close to her since before the displacement of his body. Even then, he wasn't so demanding as to kiss her. He was patient then, believing he had all the time in the world, believing she'd come to him eventually. He tantalized her then, whispering softly into her ear, coming so close that his nose buried itself into her hair. She had smelled like citrus. Sweet and tangy. He liked this approach better he decided, smirking into the kiss.

She had almost kissed him back. Sylar. A killer. Her _enemy_, her tormenter, the encompassment of all evil! He smelled like the worn leather of watchstraps. His lips were surprisingly soft and warm for such a cold-hearted man. And she almost found herself enjoying the proximity. They now sat across from each other in the slowly darkening room, watching each other curiously.

Claire's phone vibrated on her table. Their eye contact broke, and Sylar was ready to morph into Claire and pick up her phone…but she had made no move for her phone. The second ring, the third ring. She had turned back to face him. Sylar knew it was either Peter or her father calling to warn her about himself, yet she made no move to pick up and inform them of his whereabouts. On the fourth ring she picked up, he made no move to stop her and was surprised by the next words out of her mouth. "Yea dad, don't worry I'm fine…yes I'll keep an eye out" She kept her eyes on him intently.

She didn't know when she had made the decision, but she knew he couldn't hurt her. The longer she kept him here, the longer she kept him from others. That of course was her rationalization for keeping this serial killer in her dorm room. They continued to stare at each other as if uninterrupted. Claire decided that her legs were falling asleep and decided to stand up. He followed her lead. She picked up the clothes strewn on her floor from earlier. He followed her lead. She chuckled humorlessly to herself, _Sylar the destroyer, cleaning up my destruction._

Sylar looked up from his task at the sniggering girl. He smiled to herself and resisted asking what was so funny. He shut her closet door with his telekinesis and sat on her bed. She returned to her previous seat. He broke the silence again, "So…" She raised her eyebrows, challenging him. "Sylar at a loss for words? Hmm, I suppose you never were a conversationalist." She crossed her arms, he smirked, "Yes, I preferred just getting down to business." Her eyebrows receded even further. Their silence became comfortable.

"So who did you kill before coming here?" Was she really so desperate for one of 'her own' as to make small talk with this psychopath? His face remained unchanged, the same sneer, the same hair, eyes…yet he had grown older. She too felt like she had aged centuries since the last time she had seen his face. He responded with the same sneer as before, as if challenging her. "Your grandmother." She didn't even try to feign shock. She was weary and knew it would happen eventually, he would kill them all eventually. And what was she doing now? Trying to slow the process? Extend theirs and her suffering? She felt a pang in her heart. Her shoulders slumped and the smirked ebbed away from his sharp features. "You should leave…" She said sadly. She stood up and opened the door, though he probably wouldn't bother to use it. He remained sitting on her bed.

"Oh come on now _Claire-bear _she wasn't that great was she? She did some pretty awful things in her long life." He watched her shoulders tense, "Sylar. Leave." He stood up and held his arms out in defense, "Now what way is that to treat a guest?" Her stance remained the same, "You weren't invited, and I want you out." He brought her to him, shut the door, sat her down next to him and returned to his place on her bed.

"Now Claire," he said mockingly, "I know you're upset, but it can't be undone…but how's this," he continued, raising his right hand in pledge, "I promise I won't kill anymore of your grandmothers." He began laughing maniacally to himself. He straightened up and saw one tear slide down the small blonde's face. He felt his heart. He had a heart. He heard himself speak; "Claire…" his body spoke softly. Her head turned to him and another tear made its way down her face. _"Claire…"_he heard once more. His thumb involuntarily wiped a tear from her face. Who was this strangled voice? Was this voice emerging from his undefeatable body?

He had seen people cry before, many times, moments before they were brutally murdered. By him. He had seen people plead for their lives and it had no effect on his feelings. But this was different. He was Gabriel now. He was the poor Brooklyn boy who stabbed his mother by accident, who tried to hang himself, who cried after his first killing, who saw his murders played back to him in funhouse mirrors. He was weak. He dropped his hand. He left the room.

**AN/ Ok, hope you liked? Sorry if it was a little inconsistent, I was writing it as I was working on other things. I tried to keep it flowing. But in any case, I would love to hear back from you! Thanks to everyone who has reviewed so far, you really have kept this story going! Review!**


	4. Chapter 4

**AN/ I'm sorry if this one seems rushed or kind of choppy, I was working on it in short bursts of time that I had. Before I start, I just want to say that I was watching the last 2 episodes because I had missed them and all I could do was yell 'I knew it! I KNEW it!' At the computer screen. I'm guessing it's because I'm really cool?**

He watched the news uninterestedly. Of course there'd be no news of his reappearance, they had hushed up the whole government 'special people relocation' thing. He shut off the T.V. and leaned back in the dusty recliner. Nobody had thought to look here. In his dead mother's apartment. He sighed and heard the microwave ping. He left the chair and walked over to the machine, opening it and taking out leftover Chinese.  
He hadn't attempted to kill anyone else since that night, and that was weeks ago. He would almost think they stopped searching for him. But he knew better. He picked at his lo mein thoughtfully. He was normal again. Sylar would have hated that.

Claire was packing the remainder of her belongings. It was the end of the first term and she wasn't returning. After Gretchen left she had made no new friends, her classes were uninteresting, her dad was always hovering and she was better than all of it. She sighed and placed her desk lamp in a cardboard box. She wasn't too upset at leaving her 'normal' life. Normal wasn't for her.

Gabriel walked through Central Park. Hands in his pockets, staring at the clear sky and whistling. He may not be special to anyone else, but _he_ knew he was special and he knew he hadn't been this carefree in a long time. He bought an ice-cream from a kiosk and continued on his way. He sat on a bench and watched people play a game of Frisbee. He messed around with the players by using his telekinesis to move the Frisbee off course in the last second. Well you couldn't expect him to be a complete angel!

Claire had considered moving in with her mom, she considered against it. She thought about moving to her dad's, but his apartment was just depressing. She thought about living with the circus freaks, but…she couldn't bring herself to do it. She was living with Hiro Nakamura now. It was, well, strange… They had never been that close, but with Peter away all of the time saving people's lives, and her dad being all sketchy again, Peter suggested his good pal Hiro. And Hiro was distant. He believed he would die soon and didn't wish to grow close to anyone else, so she made their meals and kept to herself. However, she still found herself growing attached to the little Japanese man and waited anxiously with Ando for Hiro to return from whatever mission he had gone on.  
The walls were thin and she heard all of Hiro's whimpering for his lost love Charlie. Her heart felt heavy as he heard his nightly crying. She thought of Sylar then.

It had been a month, and Sylar was growing sick of his normal life. Normal wasn't for him. Though he had enjoyed not being hunted down for a while, the daily strolls through the park and pointless bus trips to nowhere made him feel like an old woman. This was his last day of being normal, his last day of…_Claire_. He would recognize that shade of blonde anywhere. He wanted to turn and walk in the other direction. She had seen him at his most vulnerable, she had seen…"Gabriel?" His heart stopped.

She was sitting at a Starbucks…with the man her father was tracking down. She walked through the park that day with no intention of seeing the man before her, inviting him to have coffee with her, strolling through the park with him. They had been watching each other in silence for the past five minutes. She missed his stubble and sharp jaw. She missed a killer.

"I haven't killed anyone in the past month or so." One month, four days, three hours, seven minutes and eighteen seconds. He calmly sipped his tea, smiling a little at how insane this conversation would sound to others. She gave a small smile back, "Do you plan on continuing this way of life?" He shrugged, " I'm getting bored." Her smile remained, "I wouldn't expect any less of you Sylar." What happened to Gabriel? He liked being called Gabriel…by her.

She was smiling. She hadn't smiled in the past month, and now… she was sitting in front of the man she thought she'd never forgive and smiling. The man who killed her father, her grandmother, dozens of innocent people. She found that she had not only forgiven him, but had accepted him, and yearned for him. And she finally admitted it to herself.

She was sitting on his recliner, the one he had been sitting on just hours earlier. He had taken her to his safe spot. They could find him now if she let them. He didn't think she would.  
"I love what you've done with the place…" Claire said dryly, running her finger through the layer of grim on his coffee table. Her slender finger left a clean black line on the gray surface. He smiled.

It became a regular thing. She was no longer in school, she was living in the city, she worked part-time in a diner and he was a regular customer. He knew that after work she was off to fight bad guys like him. But she warned him of when her father was near, never tried capturing him and never spoke to him of all the evil he had done. They talked about what they had done that day, what they were planning on doing, funny things they encountered, people they met, shows they saw. His hunger for powers had stopped, even when she had made the mistake of mentioning a new 'special' her father had encountered. He no longer killed. And though he was beginning to grow bored, he couldn't risk having her look at him so hatefully again.

She was running out of options. Her father had begun ignoring the problem of Sylar, Samuel was the one they were worrying about now. Yet he was elusive. There was no way to stop him. They had tried emulating what Samuel had done and began recruiting people with special powers, yet somehow, Samuel got to them first, or they were scared, or they didn't feel comfortable with killing a seemingly innocent man. Now that Sylar was freed from a constant chase, she didn't want to bring attention to him, but there was no time left for failed attempts.

As soon as he entered the diner, he knew something was going to change that day. He sat at his regular booth, ordered his regular black coffee and prepared himself for a very irregular day.

"Sylar." She said shortly, sitting at his table. He smirked at her curt business manner and sipped his coffee.  
"Claire…"  
"You know what I'm going to ask." He gave a dry chuckled and placed his coffee cup down, he held both her hands and spoke, "Yes, but I'd like to hear you say it."  
She rolled her eyes, pulled her hands away and made it quick.  
"I need you to kill Samuel."

His need to kill had gone, but his need for Claire's acceptance had not. As he entered the disappearing carnival, he was met by a familiar blonde.  
"Sylar."  
"Lydia."

He did not kill Samuel then. Claire was furious, but soon she understood. She found herself at Peter's doorstep, hoping that he was home. A tired looking Peter opened the door, Claire breathed a sigh of relief. "Peter, I need your help." Was all she spoke before being ushered in.

He sat at his usual booth knowing that she wouldn't come. The woman who poured his coffee that day smiled sadly as she spoke, "She quit this morning sweetie, I'm sorry." She walked away and Sylar remained, sipping on his coffee calmly. He would return that night.

Claire left Peter's with a smile on her face. She knew she could count on him, she then glanced quickly at the time and ran to the diner. He was gone. "Shit." She turned back towards the street and hailed a cab, "Just go straight." She demanded, looking at the compass in her hand.

He was back at the carnival. As he watched the girl throwing fire from her hands he contemplated his next move. He felt uneasy and turned around. Samuel.  
In his worst nightmares he did not imagine he would be stuck in the earth and surrounded by suddenly ravenous looking carnies. Samuel smiled down from above and whispered so that only Sylar heard, "They don't want you to kill their father, they don't want this family torn apart…" Sylar imagined that Samuel's smile was what his own smirk looked like to those he had killed. He cringed at the thought. "Gabriel!" His old name sounded so foreign, yet, the lovely blonde who spoke them made him feel like home. The carnies turned toward the once cheerleader and suddenly the hunger inside him roared to life.

He was standing over the dead body of the ringmaster, Samuel. He was surrounded by the questioning faces of a confused family, and all he could see was her.

Peter stood across from the mad who had killed his mother, and his brother. And though he didn't really want to give the man a hug, he didn't want to hurt him either. He turned to the people who were now to be his family. "I know this is a shock to you, but you have to trust me. We don't want to tear you apart, we don't want to ruin the peaceful existence you have, we want to help make you safer, happier." A blonde woman emerged from the crowd of people and stood next to him. She spoke, "He was our answer all along. When Joseph was killed…by Samuel." The family gasped, and began speaking amongst themselves. Lydia continued louder still, "When Samuel killed Joseph, it was not for our sakes. Samuel was not the right leader for us; he was not caring or compassionate, he didn't care about our desires and our safety. We need another Joseph, not another Samuel. And Peter is the one we need."  
The carnies remained silent. There was nothing they could do about Samuel's death, and they did not want their family destroyed. Lydia could read what they needed, and they had to believe her. A few members grumbled and returned to their areas, and the rest continued to look at Samuel's body.

Claire was not listening. She was smiling and looking at the man that she hated not so long ago. He stepped over Samuel's body and walked to her. She smiled further still as he took her hand and walked her out of the carnival.

She was proud. She was smiling because of him, for him. She was proud of him. Sylar had never known the feeling of someone else's pride. He was proud, but no one was proud of him. His mother wanted him to be more, she was not proud of who he was. His father had left him as a child, not proud of the seemingly untalented boy. Society was never proud of serial killers, and other specials lived in fear of him. But this small blonde girl was proud. And he wouldn't have it any other way.

**AN/ Cheesy ending, I'm aware, but idk, i just kind of wanted to wrap it up. I'm hoping that motive wasn't too obvious. Sorry if I dissappointed, I'm hoping you guys liked it (And yes this is the end) As for upcoming episodes, here's my prediction,  
They're going to have to stop Samuel and need Sylar's help because he's the only one that's powerful enough to do it. And he's going to become kind of a hero in his own way.  
As for the previous two episodes, I knew it! Haha, I knew he would end up at Claire's and I knew it from the beginning!! And after that last scene I thought of all these predictions that I can't remember now, I'll have to rewatch it, but... he's going to help Claire take down Samuel! WOOOOT! **


End file.
